Thursday, September 13, 2012

Sideshow: Levi Johnston breeds again - Philadelphia Inquirer

Multiple baby daddy Levi Johnston has asserted his fiendish potency once again. Us mag reports that he and yearlong gf Sunny Oglesby have welcomed daughter Breeze Beretta Johnston up in Wasilla, Alaska. BBJ is, let's see, oh, yeah, half-sister to Johnston son Tripp, fostered with Bristol Palin, daughter of inspirational speaker and former political candidate Sarah. Levi says he's trying to get custody of Tripp. Yeah, right. BTW, Bristol starts on Dancing With the Stars: All-Stars next week. As for Levi, siring bairns is something he seems to do better than almost anything else. In fact, aside from that, name a salient talent of his. Wait. We'll think of one. We really will. . . .

A really big show

It's not just the Coachella Music & Arts Festival any more. If parent company Goldenvoice has any say in it, the two-weekend music riot, which over the years has featured the top rock and hip-rap acts in the universe, folks like Kanye West, Radiohead, Paul McCartney, Cee Lo Green, R.E.M. (now deceased), and, yes, Swedish House Mafia, will expand to five different weekends. There's already two, count 'em, Coachella cruise ships, one to Jamaica and one to the Bahamas; you, too, can pay to be on a boat with rock-and-rollers! But Goldenvoice is pressing the little town of Indio, Calif., Coachella's home, for more land for the shows, and lighter taxation on the take. Next year's tickets are $349 for the weekend. (The same slate of acts plays each weekend.) Last year, Snoop Dogg was presented in hologram; in 2013, it will be Elvis. Who never really left the building.

Ten years later, sitting on top

Welcome back, Matchbox Twenty. The band that now spells out its number is here with its first full-length studio album since 2002, North, and, looky here - it's the group's first No. 1 on the Billboard 200 album chart, selling an acceptable but not overwhelming 95,000 units. (Ten years ago, its last one, More Than You Think You Are, debuted at six and sold 178K its first week, so you can see how the air is out of the CD balloon, probably forever.) The rest of the top 10: (2) Night Visions, by Imagine Dragons, 83K; (3) Gravity, by Lecrae, 72K; (4) Now 43, a compilation, 35K; (5) Blown Away, by Carrie Underwood, 29K; (6) Overexposed, by Maroon 5, 29K; (7) Based on a T.R.U. Story, by 2 Chainz, 26K; (8) Eye on It, by tobyMac, 26K; (9) Chapter V, by Trey Songz, 24K; and (10) Sun, by Cat Power, 23K. The top digital single, four weeks now, is "We Are Never Getting Back Together," by Taylor Swift, selling a lovely 284K.

A mother's quest for shelter

Porn pays, yo. Come on, you knew that. So did Nadya "Octomom" Suleman, evidently. The former, and perhaps future, reality-TV star told the world she couldn't afford a house for her 14 kids, whom she has borne via fertility treatments. She even went on welfare. And five months ago, she and brood were evicted from their home in dense, confused La Habra, Calif. Now, yes, we know she said she'd do anything to feed her children except porn - but why not keep, shall we say, all options open? What does a multiple mom do? Strip for the camera! She hied her to the San Fernando Valley, beating heart of all things porn, and shed all for the greedy eye. Now, hurray, she has enough dough from the smutty flicks to rent a house. TMZ sez the pad is out in Palmdale, Calif., five BDR, 3 bath, 3-car gar, $2,150/mo. Cheap by Calif. standards! She paid eight months' rent in advance! The world loves a working girl.

Gwyn too pooped to Pepper?

Gwyneth Paltrow, just done filming Iron Man 3, says she's not sure she'll return as Pepper Potts in Avengers 2, opposite Robert Downey Jr. She told E! News that "I'm getting old for that" - let's pretend she said stuff. Come back, Gwyn: You're good in the role and make the Iron Man flicks vibrate. The rest of the Avengers crew is likely to return for the sequel to the mega-über-ur-mondo-moneymaker movie, including RDJ, Scarlett Johansson, Chris Hemsworth, Samuel L. Jackson, Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, and Tom Hiddleston. Gwyn has a while to make mind up: Disney says the second Avengers will debut in May 2015.

The lady will not need a drink

Britney Spears is staying dry on the set of X Factor. Brit, a judge on Simon "Darth" Cowell's faux-talent show, has given her people strict orders to make sure no booze is about anyplace. She's a rehab vet, and she's serious. Us mag reports a hotel rider that says, "Very important: We require you to empty the minibars of all alcohol. And no gifts of wine or any other alcoholic beverages, please." Cowell really likes working with Brit, even though she's, as he puts it, "hard to please." Good for her, we at "SideShow" say.

Klum confirms

OK, so on Wednesday's edition of Katie Couric's show Katie, guest Heidi Klum confirmed that, yes, as suspected, she is indeed dating her bodyguard, Martin Kristen. The supermodel and business dynamo, in the process of divorcing husband Seal, fudged about this being a relationship or what: "I don't even know if I can call it that, you know? It just started so I don't know. I don't know where it's gonna go." HK was photographed gettin' close to Kristen last month. Plus, Seal unfortunately quipped he wished she'd waited before she decided to "fornicate with the help." Ai-ai-ai! Later, he walked that dog back a little, meaning he wished she'd let the divorce be final, not that she'd ever cheated on him. Glad that's cleared up!

A drifting snowfall of gossip

Kate Middleton, royal wife of Prince William of England, made heads explode Tuesday at a state banquet in Singapore - when she turned down a glass of wine, twice, and even toasted her mommy-in-law, Queen Elizabeth II, with a glass of water. OMG IS SHE PREGNANT??? WITH A POSSIBLE HEIR TO THE THRONE!!!?!?!? screamed the tabs. Well, she doesn't actually drink much. . . . Justin Bieber showed his manly manfulness in London, grabbing paparazzi by the collar and getting them out of the way between himself and his adoring fans. . . . Two-time Olympic medalist Nancy Kwan is engaged to her White House National Security staff guy, Clay Pell.
Wire services contributed to this article. Contact "SideShow" at

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